Tuesday, December 29, 2009

illusion hunger

last week debbe w. cured my cuticle biting with eft, but as it turns out, french horror movies can reverse the effects. the plan to watch haute tension as an antidote to avatar was a misfire. martyrs this was not. i was actually engaged and disturbed to the point of not being able to finish my bowl of peanut butter zigzag ice cream until the film's pitiful climax took all the air out of it. repressed lesbian desires? you have got to be kidding me alexandre aja. this was some seriously homophobic crap. and i don't want to watch movies through a politicized lens, i really don't! i just want to dissolve and be re-made by ereshkigal's eyes of death! is that too much to ask?

Monday, December 28, 2009

i think i might have to blog in all caps tonight


oh my god. i need to get this film out of my system. i think the only thing that kept me from going the way of michael jackson while watching it was digging little half moons into my forearms and occasionally glancing over at luca in his 3d glasses. i think i'm going to have to take in some french extreme cinema to exorcise this beast. and if you are reading this and feel like sending a prayer my way to ease the soreness of my heart, i'd sincerely appreciate it because god damn that was painful.

Friday, December 25, 2009

merry christmas!

oh boy did the jew girl ever get toys this morning!!!!

Thursday, December 17, 2009

how it feels to be free

can i get a wut wut for the fcs jazz band?!

Friday, December 11, 2009

the ultimate in gifts

i sent this video to my mom since she found "dick in a box" so amusing:

her response: "What lovely sons! They give the ultimate in gifts - it just goes to show that the best "things" ("gifts") in life are free!!!!! How thoughtful can one get!"

Thursday, December 10, 2009

got me workin' workin' day and night

all i want is to get the dining room/library in working order. so this is my plan. every hour i am going to post a picture of my progress. here is the room in its current state:

next picture to be taken at 7:30pm, due to dinner interruption and michael jackson dance rehearsal with samara. luca is cooking tonight - yeah baby!


onward christian soldiers!


progress! now time for a cookie baking break. next and last photo of the night coming at 10pm.

it's 9:30 now and i can't possibly do any more. here is my last picture for the evening:

unfortunately, the other side of the room looks like this:

tomorrow: bring up the last two bookshelves, fill them with books and organize the rest of the boxes.

Wednesday, December 2, 2009

warm beds: warm fullblooded life

buy nothing day was pretty uneventful. not being on the computer so much at work freed me up a lot. i cleaned up the studio and worked on the quilt. at night the lack of light and electronic stimulation just made me really tired so i went to sleep at around 8. painting bookshelves by candle light seemed an absurd prospect.

now it's almost midnight and either i am too tired to make sense of the last chapter of my ulysses reading or it's just one of those chapters. i'll pick up in the morning. hopefully i'll be able to finish the last 20 pages before class. it's peaceful here at night. i'm sitting in the kitchen, empty dishes from late-night snack, yams stuffed with cranberries and chestnuts, homemade seitan, rain coming down outside. tomorrow we are having our heating system replaced, so either luca and i will be keeping warm by the fireplace or checking into the chestnut hill hotel.

worked my first shift at the co-op this evening. very heartening to stock shelves of tomato sauce, ghee, granola, to pack mixed nuts and organic popcorn.

"mr. bloom walked unheeded along his grove by saddened angels, crosses, broken pillars, family vaults, stone hopes praying with upcast eyes, old ireland's hearts and hands."

Thursday, November 26, 2009

wildcat general strike

if you don't know about 'buy nothing day', listen up. 'buy nothing day' is a culture jamming holiday. it's a day to resist that mad rush toward wasteful consumerism and reconnect with what's important. this year mr. lasn and company are upping the ante. here's what they have in mind:

So this November 27 (November 28 in Europe and overseas), we’re calling for a Wildcat General Strike. We’re asking tens of millions of people around the world to bring the capitalist consumption machine to a grinding – if only momentary – halt.

We want you to not only stop buying for 24 hours, but to shut off your lights, televisions and other nonessential appliances. We want you to park your car, turn off your phones and log off of your computer for the day. We’re calling for a Ramadan-like fast. From sunrise to sunset we’ll abstain en masse, not only from holiday shopping, but from all the temptations of our five-planet lifestyles.

Take the Plunge - you know what they say: a journey of a thousand miles starts with a single step. You feel that things are falling apart – the temperature rising, the oceans churning, the global economy heaving – why not do something? Take just one small step toward a more just and sustainable future. Make a pact with yourself: go on a consumer fast. Lock up your credit cards, put away your cash and opt out of the capitalist spectacle. You may find that it’s harder than you think, that the impulse to buy is more ingrained in you than you ever realized. But you will persist and you will transcend – perhaps reaching the kind of epiphany that can change the world.

i'll be at work tomorrow, but i think i'll only check my messages twice and log on to my computer once. i will have to use lights so people can see their work, and i'll have to drive there and back. but i'm on board from 5:30 on. i'll post about it on saturday.

now i've gotta make another batch of wild mushroom strudel, bring the painted bookshelf upstairs and get ready to drive to new jersey. this time last year carolyn was snapping her fingers in church and in 2007, i was embarrassed at the ifc.

Tuesday, November 24, 2009

brett and stephanie

check out this sweet photo of my cousin brett at his wedding 2 weekends ago!

luca was a little overwhelmed by all the white 80's music, so i let loose just dancing with myself.

Monday, November 23, 2009

nature is satan's church

found some nice photos of trees by french photographer yannick demmerle. he says: "i spend my time trying to photograph the invisible between the trees, for example fear... the tree itself does not interest me."

Sunday, November 22, 2009

happy chic

i have found the interior designer of my dreams and his name is jonathan adler. jonathan, jonathan, please come to my house and make my dining room look like this:

oh no... i think i might have to get his book... or better yet, i'll ask for it for chanukah!

Thursday, November 19, 2009

the best part of monday night

was not when sam told my mom that they were going to "take me places". it was not paula's well-deserved round of applause. it was not beverly's "f-word f-word f-word". it was not angela blue's ego-inflating praises. it was not my total ease in speaking in front of an audience. it was not the oohs and ahs from the audience. it was not my sister coming all the way from new jersey. it was not meghan's gratitude. it was not the avocado rolls. it was not my dad's pride. it was not caroline's tears. it was not seidel's "struggling with venus" remarks (though that came seriously close). it was not people lining up to talk to me.

the best part of monday night was coming home and changing into my sweatpants to watch a freshly downloaded episode of dexter in high-def and eating the chinese food that luca got for me from jasmine's. yes indeedy.

Thursday, November 12, 2009

kidneys in my mind

dear anxiety, my constant companion of late, most unwelcome companion. you are different from the piercing emotions - you hover and surround. you have no point of origin, no satisfying outlet. more like static, yes, a station not quite tuned, creating interference. i try to make you invisible, though you feel so obvious. i try to talk through you but you create this awful distance between the impetus to speak and the manifestation of my voice. it sounds hollow and unfamiliar, running on a parallel track to that other voice, the one that says flee! now! i was so looking forward to class this evening and i feel like you tried to ruin it for me. you kept screaming in my ear, "stop talking! your mind is feeble and fraudulent. you're embarrassing yourself." i remind myself that i am there to learn, not to impress the teacher, but you interrupt my self-assurance with brutality. why do you tell me i am hideous and incompetent? are you really just a product of stress? of one thing after another without a break? or do you merely create a portal for the minotaur to come in and trample on my ego? can i quiet you with relaxation? direct you with my breath? you simmer without erupting. i imagine you seizing me completely, i picture how it would happen. a break in consciousness, panic, escape. i see it happening in my mind, just like i used to imagine it in middle school. back then i imagined hiding in the big tire. someone would find me there, a teacher or a boy that i liked. they would come into the tire with me and we would sit together, apart from the world of haute tension. we would stay there until, woefully, we agreed to go back. what is your function? i thought perhaps you were a signal of uncertainty. your presence an indication of doubt - will you meet an expectation that has been set? can you do the thing you have set out to do or will you fail? but tonight you felt more savage than a question. tonight you wanted blood. i ask my charges, what is the need beneath the impulse? and so i ask myself, what is it that i need? why does my mind attack me? what kind of code says "YOU ARE SO FUCKING STUPID" when it means "you need to unwind and take care of yourself." seriously, if the impulse is signaling a need, why does it take such a hostile form? why does it demand blood and not suggest tea? on monday i'm going to be talking about these things in front of nearly every authority figure in my life. i will tell them about inner monsters and how all they need is love. tonight my monsters are large. katharina? will you take them out to play in the park? they're hungry and they want to eat people. run them around until they get sleepy and small, until their monster costumes turn back into footy pajamas. read to them and kiss them goodnight. i feel better.

Wednesday, November 11, 2009

closer to fine

-james, guess why i'm so happy today.
-because your skin is so soft and you smell so good?
-because i finished my ulysses reading for class tomorrow night and i saw my first private practice patient.

Tuesday, November 10, 2009

coffee shop review: infusion

7133 germantown avenue
philadelphia, pa
(215) 248 1718

my new local coffee shop is just a hop, skip and a jump over to germantown avenue. it certainly has its plusses and minuses, but all in all it's not a bad haunt. the plusses: walking to a coffee shop! one of life's great pleasures. also, infusion sells my favorite brownies from vegan treats and bubble tea too. for the most part, they play good, unintrusive music, making it suitable for reading and working on presentations about art therapy and eating disorders. the minuses: service is a problem. the folks behind the counter seem pretty disinterested and if you don't watch them closely, they'll probably forget to use soy milk in your soy latte. they also sometimes run out of soy milk. infusion is also hella expensive. for a brownie and a chai it's nearly $8 and you can't pay with an atm card if your order is less than $10, so if you're like me, and never seem to have any cash, that means you'll be taking a raspberry crumble bar to go as well. they also don't have iced coffee off-season. so don't order one or they'll just water-down some espresso with tap and add a few ice cubes. yuck. infusion's vegan offerings are limited. they sell some of moshe's prepared wraps at jacked up prices and a really yummy hummus wrap called a zorba. in addition to the vegan brownies from my facebook friend danielle konya, they also have cookies and aforementioned raspberry crumbles. no cake, unfortunately. if infusion would get some peanut butter bomb and chocolate covered strawberry shortcake action up in that joint, i would stop complaining about the service and the prices. so it's a mixed bag. i'm sure i will keep going to infusion for as long as i'm living here and maybe even supply them with some vegan treats of my own.

Monday, November 9, 2009

on being an extreme embarassment

This is an urgent request to cancel this order immediately, as my daughter Zoe Brasi made an error in the process of ordering. Unfortunately, she ordered 12 large plates instead of several place settings adding up to $675 with shipping and giftwrap for SS and BK. I need to speak with you as this is extremely embarrassing and must be corrected. I can be reached this evening until 8:25 pm at 212-555-7418. After that, I can be reached on my cellphone 215-555-7231. Tomorrow morning I can be reached at 212-555-7418 until 1:00 pm and in the afternoon and evening on my cellphone. Thank you in advance for your immediate attention to this matter. 
-Marjorie Prizer

Saturday, November 7, 2009

the box

after a strange quilt-making workshop that left me and lauren feeling like sweatshop managers, i came home and began mechanically filling more spice jars until i found myself just staring off into space. luca wanted to go see the box in bala since we missed it last night. samara has recently taken an interest in horror movies so that worked out nicely. nothing like a paranoia movie about existential dread when you're already soaked in anxiety. critics always seem to have disdain for creative or audacious film-making; southland tales was one of my favorites from 2006 and it was completely dismissed by the critics. same story with the box. it's "a mess", "a failure". yawn. i thought it was pretty kick-ass, despite the humorously shlocky exposition. the premise: a down-on-their-luck (or so it seems) couple, are visited by a creepy stranger with a horrendously deformed face, who presents them with a mysterious present - a choice. they are given a box containing a button, that when pressed, guarantees them a million dollars. at the same time, someone unknown to them will die. the movie is infused with a pervasive feeling of intense dread and guilt as the protagonists make their choice and find themselves entangled in a sinister and metaphysical morality test that is at times bewilderingly overstated and at others ridiculously oblique. i was surprised by the experience of being pulled in and out of the emotional texture of the film. in some scenes the feeling of inevitable doom - the unshakable "it's already done" creepiness - is unbearable. and then james marsden is being followed through a library by an apex of zombie-looking people and absurd humor eclipses the dread. i also felt connected to the love between the characters. you feel that they are truly in this together, and that their devotion to each other must be their salvation - but then these moments of transcendence melt back into fear. the allusions to lynch and kubrick were appreciated as well - much of the drama felt like an amped-up sci-fi psychedelic version of eyes wide shut, where the overmatched male lead struggled to maintain composure and control in the face of something much larger and more powerful than he could ever hope to grasp. then in a quick turn, the powerful forces seem silly and shlocky again, clearing the fog of dread. is it real? are there consequences? what if there are? no, it couldn't be... but... what the?... i quite like richard kelly.

and luca, i will try not to objectify cameron diaz anymore. because it's wrong.

calgon take me away

alone at night i go over escape routes in my mind. this painting arrives in my inbox - "midnight sun, norway", david hockney.

mmm, it's made of watercolor and gouache. not enough to look at it on my computer screen. i want in it. such a futile yearning. that sunburst, pulling me endlessly toward it. norway. there's other intangibles too, like mingling with the ghosts on forbidden drive. must preserve the memories, protect them from what happened after. longing for the autumn trees that canopy the path, but it's so cold outside. they entice you and ravage you.

the tangibles are unhelpful in a different sort of way. chocolate comforts but only to a point. take more than a little and it starts to taste like unmet needs, like sneaking love when no one's looking.

the best moments of solace in this sea of anxiety: filling my new spice jars and listening to laurie anderson in the dark. this one takes me there:

Pieces And Parts - Laurie Anderson

Thursday, October 22, 2009

a tension between stagnation and chaos

it seems fitting to post this painting by mie morkeberg as we are trying to set up our new house.

Tuesday, October 13, 2009

his name is luca - he lives on the 2nd floor

but not for long! happy birthday, my love. soon we will be watching amityville horror in our new house and our entire music library will be digitized! here is a little something to amuse you on this auspicious day:

"You know what you look like to me, with your good bag and your cheap shoes? You look like a rube. A well scrubbed, hustling rube with a little taste. Good nutrition's given you some length of bone, but you're not more than one generation from poor white trash, are you, Agent Starling? And that accent you've tried so desperately to shed: pure West Virginia. What is your father, dear? Is he a coal miner? Does he stink of the lamp? You know how quickly the boys found you... all those tedious sticky fumblings in the back seats of cars... while you could only dream of getting out... getting anywhere... getting all the way to the F..B..I.!"

tonight: ice cream and punch! (and packing...)

Saturday, October 10, 2009

one thing i did not count on

paint fumes. (= spaced out zoe)

Wednesday, October 7, 2009

can't think of any zingers

my last break before the shit gets real: a lovely evening sipping green tea in a sukkah with jonathan and his wife larah. vijay's room is packed. the hallway is packed. all the books and dvds are packed. samara's room is half-packed. luca is transferring our music library to his computer. come friday, i will be faux finishing the interior of our new crib, under the tutelage of mr. bill ryan. i feel only slightly insane. think i'm going to watch dr. horrible's sing-along blog now.

Tuesday, October 6, 2009

want to be in a bad mood

why is it that within the 2 week span of our move, every cultural event that i would ever want to attend is occurring:

~opening of barkley hendricks exhibit
~opening of arshile gorky exhibit
~closing of matisse exhibit
~xenakis concert
~new catherine breillat movie
~new lars von trier movie
~new peter greenaway movie


Thursday, October 1, 2009

first ulysses class: a door creaks open

the time: thursday, 6 - 8
the place: the rosenbach museum
the subject: ulysses
the instructor: paul saint-amour

i got out of this first class exactly what i had been wanting: a way in. start by identifying the point of view. in looking at a passage from the first page, we ask, where did that word "chrysostomos" come from? who said that? it seems that this is a text of interrupting narrators. paul instructed us to look out for "hybrid zones," or "the uncle charles principle," where narration and interior monologue are fused. sometimes characters will quote other characters in their minds. sometimes we miss a piece of the action because we are in a character's mind. as readers, we sniff out who is saying what. which words don't fit with the others? what is the tone and vocabulary of each character's inner life? stephen's is poetic, self-conscious, a "dense industrial fog" of "historic bitterness." and notice who doesn't get any interior monologues. this is a helpful start and an invigorating intellectual space.

and by the way, who remembers my moody brooding post where i show how spongebob made a reference to julien donkey-boy? turns out it's actually thrice removed from the source! ulysses, page 8, line 235: "don't mope over it all day, he said. i'm inconsequent. give up the moody brooding." this is apparently a reference to the odyssey, where antinous says to telemakhos, "...control your temper! come on, get over it, no more grim thoughts..." amazing!

Wednesday, September 30, 2009

my mind is going

can't function. way too much to do. kitchen is a mess. want to go to sleep and dream of cake. it is 8:01pm. if it were 8 i would feel much better about all this, but it's 1 minute past the hour. i will make a plan. i will follow the plan.

1) clean up the kitchen. listen to me first and the gimme gimmes for energy. drink a large glass of water.
2) read the first 2 chapters of the odyssey (ulysses class starts tomorrow!)
3) pack up the remainder of the living room.
4) tidy up bedroom. drink ebb tide of cognac. fall asleep to the daily show.

here you go, zo, here you go. BAM!

Sunday, September 27, 2009

midnight, downtown

got our tickets for "this is it" and a poster for samara's birthday. not the andy warhol portrait that was just auctioned off for an undisclosed sum of money. i'm talking about the movie poster!

she is going to be so happy!

a grief that you cannot name

at night to calm my mind i have been reading a few pages at a time of janet frame's faces in the water. her writing is achingly beautiful. not since reading the opening of la batarde have i felt such a flood of emotional depth from the written word. it's as if she is speaking from a place that i know intimately, but that has always remained in darkness. she opens every window to it, plus corridors i have never dared explore.

"...i feel myself dropping as if a trap door had opened into darkness... then i rise disembodied from the dark to grasp and attach myself like a homeless parasite to the shape of my identity and its position in space and time. at first i cannot find my way, i cannot find myself where i left myself, someone has removed all trace of me. i am crying."


Thursday, September 24, 2009

you never know how psychotic that person is

pretty nutty

i have packing for the last four hours and i have come to the point where i can no longer put items in boxes and arrange them neatly. some startling relics from the past:

~a collage that becca r. made me with flowers glued to the hair of fcs graduates from long ago
~my charlie manson clock that says "now is the time for helter skelter"
~the newt
~"gemma's journey", the children's book i made in grad school
~my totally edgy image response journal
~flyer for the intellectual stoop sale
~the obsession movie, which i am so tempted to post here, but i think it's too embarassing... maybe i'll just post a clip from the opening

well, i've now been working on converting the movie to an imovie compatible format in order to clip the beginning and post it for about half an hour. this is getting crazy. we are buying a house tomorrow!!!!

i know what i'll post while the footage is uploading.

who are those michael jackson look-a-likes at point pleasant??

Saturday, September 19, 2009

march 5th, 1997

at school, a bus was to leave, a camp bus, off to oberlin. i was to get on this bus but i didn't want to do it! all those horrible memories of camp buses and camp and being on my own - alone. god help me, i want anything more than to get on that bus. he was there, we were walking, hand in hand. we left campus and walked across, appearing in my house, my room. around my room. i wanted him to look at my room, look around in fascination, i wanted to take him through it - show him my cds and books. i wanted him to notice the stuff on the floor and all of it. he just wanted to make sure i had everything i needed, i wanted to say wait! there must be something... wait! i'm not ready! we left my room and he led me back to the bus.

Thursday, September 17, 2009

Monday, September 14, 2009

r.i.p. johnny castle

it's a pity embedding has been disabled for this video, because it would be an honor to have it on my blog:

nobody puts baby in the corner

patrick swayze, you have given me much joy in this life. in third grade i watched "dirty dancing" five times in one weekend and it still gives me a tingly thrill - all because of you.

Sunday, September 13, 2009

art saves lives

today i went on a mural arts tour of west philly with the dvata. it was kind of frustrating that i couldn't get a good look at all of the murals because either the driver couldn't stop or i was on the wrong side of the bus, but it was enjoyable nonetheless. i learned that the mural arts program has produced more than 3000 murals since is inception in 1984, making it one of the largest public arts initiatives in the nation. it started as a way to decrease graffiti in philadelphia by redirecting the energy of graffiti artists from destructive to constructive ends. under the direction of artist jane golden, it took off. each mural tells a story about the neighborhood and engages residents in the process of its creation. more than 20,000 young people have participated in the program. mural arts also provides opportunities to incarcerated individuals and ex-inmates to be involved in community projects. here are some of the ones i saw:

"murals work on a symbolic level, providing opportunities for communities to express important concerns,values and aspirations - their yearning to be free of violence and fear, their hopes for a better world, their desire for beauty." ~jane golden

Friday, September 11, 2009

greg drasler

another interesting painter i discovered from the re-title mailing list. he paints mostly surrealistic interiors like cars, rooms and luggage, as well as random objects on pillows and lots and lots of hats. i love his color palette and the subtlety of his technique. in his artist statement, he cites agoraphobia and claustrophobia as the "cardinal navigation points" of his work. these are some of my favorites:

"I begin paintings as larks, jokes or problems and I finish them like religous paintings."

addictive logic

craig nakken, author of the addictive personality explains:

addiction is a process of buying into false and empty promises: the false promise of relief, the false promise of emotional security, the false sense of fulfillment... like any other major illness, addiction is an experience that changes people in permanent ways. that is why it's so important that people in recovery attend twelve step and other self-help meetings on a regular basis; the addictive logic remains deep inside of them and looks for an opportunity to reassert itself in the same or in a different form.

i wonder if he writes about how that logic forms in terms of the relational precursors to finding those promises so enticing and so darkly irresistible. i guess i'll never find out since my current project is to finish all the books i borrowed from the r*nfrew library, then fulfill my stated goal of reading some jungian feminist texts and reporting back to dr. h. i have a different sort of addiction that is comprised of me committing to ideas in my head about great things i will do and making these ideas known to others so as to ensure their completion, not doing them and then applying massive amounts of pressure, thus forcing me to either complete the project in frustration and resentment or abandon it with guilt and a pervasive sense of inadequacy. here i go again!

Thursday, September 10, 2009

phenomenology of schizophrenia

this is why sometimes it's really fun to read art therapy books:

"figure 56 represents a stalk of celery which appeared to move and speak. florence, who drew this hallucination, said that just as she was about to eat the celery, it spoke to her saying, 'don't eat me.' it had a soft, male voice like that of her father. she described it as wearing a skirt and moving 'the way a penis moves.'"

i don't think i would be very helpful to schizophrenics. i would probably think their paranoid delusions about government-run mind control operations and alien conspiracies were true. and i'd probably be too fascinated by their unusual perceptions to want to blot them out. best to stick with eating disorders.

Saturday, September 5, 2009

there will be cupcakes

come on down to the veggie cabaret tonight to get your vegan cupcake on and see dan piraro and company live! i've been baking all morning and i'm working up the audacity to charge a dollar for a cup of filtered water. of the three people i know doing fringe performances this year, this one might be the least lame, and i guarantee it will have the best concessions. vanilla/chocolate, cookies & cream, carrot cake, coconut lime, strawberry lemonade, you know you want it. mention my blog and i'll give you every single cupcake for free.

i have full confidence that this post will draw hordes, especially given how many people voted for my ulysses poll.

i'll also be at the blessing of the animals next week selling goodies.

Thursday, September 3, 2009

microwaves and cell phones

ever since lenya came over in june and insisted on heating our vegan lasagna in the oven, i've been a little suspicious of our microwave. a couple weeks ago, luca and i stopped using it altogether. here's why:

microwaves don't actually heat your food - they just rotate the polarity of the molecules in it millions of times per second, causing the structures to be torn apart and deformed. this is a process that no organic system can withstand for any extended period of time. when you consume food heated in the microwave, it changes the make-up of your blood. hemoglobin levels and lymphocytes decrease while white cell and cholesterol levels increase. changing the molecular structure of the food renders it carcinogenic. even just being around a microwave can cause physical and psychological disturbances, including memory loss, lowered concentration, emotional instability and impaired intellectual capacities. this is a result of electro-magnetic radiation leakage. the u.s. government has not conducted any tests on the effects of nuking your food. the soviet union, on the other hand, banned microwaves in 1976.

on a similar note, cell phones have been in the news recently following studies linking their use with brain tumors. lloyd morgan, lead author and member of the bioelectromagnetics society says:

“Exposure to cell phone radiation is the largest human health experiment ever undertaken, without informed consent, and has some 4 billion participants enrolled.

Science has shown increased risk of brain tumors from use of cell phones, as well as increased risk of eye cancer, salivary gland tumors, testicular cancer, non-Hodgkin's lymphoma and leukemia.

The public must be informed.”

these are the apparent risks of cell phone use:

• brain tumors
• blood cell damage and cellular changes
• DNA damage
• nerve-cell damage
• acceleration and contribution to the onset of autism
• alzheimer’s disease
• eye damage
• Cause sleep disruptions, fatigue and headache

Tuesday, September 1, 2009

another irishman

i had seen a pair of portraits by the irish painter william orpen at the clark museum and jotted his name down to investigate. turns out he was an official war painter beginning in 1916. he was sent to france where he depicted privates, dead soldiers, german pow's and ravaged landscapes. i didn't even know there were war painters.

in 1921, orpen published a memoir about his experiences called william orpen: an onlooker in france. in it he expressed critical attitudes about world war one and how it was managed. apparently all the suffering that orpen witnessed took a toll on his later work, which many critics regarded as "detached" and "shallow."

stately, plump buck mulligan?

the rosenbach museum is starting their annual ulysses course next month. i'm on the fence about signing up, so i thought i would poll my readers for direction in this matter.

as i see it, these are the pros and cons of taking the course:

-a great chance to read one of the great masterpieces of literature in a structured, guided way
-a great chance to actually understand one of the great masterpieces of literature because the course is being led by an english professor from the u. of penn
-luca will be impressed if i do it
-if i complete the course, i can read at bloomsday 2010

-it may add pressure and stress to my life to read by an externally imposed schedule
-if i don't complete the course i will be disappointed in myself
-it costs $320

Monday, August 31, 2009

in the snow

here's a nice photo i found on flickr of the bridge from a different angle in the snow:

the red white and grey are fantastic! makes me want to do a snow painting.

Sunday, August 30, 2009


ever since i switched over to my brasi blog, readers without blogs of their own have had trouble leaving comments that aren't anonymous. i changed the settings so that now you can leave a comment with your name as long as you have a google account. angela - let me know if you have any difficulty with that. anonymous comments are disabled because i can't figure out a way to leave it open ended.

Saturday, August 29, 2009

more of my art

since i finished my painting of the thomas mill bridge, i thought i would post some other art i've done over the years.

here are some drawings of lauren's various parts that i called "fragments":

this painting won me an award at my high school! it's still hanging there:

this was a fun installation i put together in college, inspired by my interest in serial killers and women's studies. lauren was kind enough to let me plaster-cast her:

here are some of my favorite portraits i've done. the first is of luca:

this one is my dad. no one in my family likes it because he looks really angry:

this one i did from a photograph of my mom when she was pregnant with me. i called it "expecting":

this is buffy and angel from when i was living in brooklyn. i never seemed to be able to make enough money to pay my rent, so i got this idea to make pop culture paintings and sell them on ebay. this is the only one i did and i never even sold it because my mom took a liking to it so i wound up giving it to her for mother's day:

this one's lisa t.:

and galen, who i used to babysit for:

this was a series of three drawings that i did over a number of years. they are all connected to me. the first came out of a need for separation from my mother and acceptance of who i was at 17. i called it "it's time" and it's still one of my favorite things i've ever drawn:

this one was my depression in college:

this is my red girl, voluptuous and in love: